Concern for our own safety is hard-wired into our brain. The oldest part of our brain, the reptilian brain, or brain stem, is solely concerned with survival. It first emerged in fish some 500 million years ago, and it regulates critical functions like heartbeat and digestion.
The limbic, or mammalian brain developed later, probably about 300 million years ago. The limbic brain is the seat of the emotions. The reptilian and limbic brain together could be called our “first brain”, since the neo-cortex, the last part of the human brain to evolve, didn’t appear until only 3 or 4 million years ago. This “new brain” is the part that thinks, plans and reasons.
What does all that have to do with speaking in public? The first brain is responsible for your survival. When it identifies a threat to your safety, it puts your whole body on red alert, preparing you to fight or flee for your life. You feel fear. Your heartbeat speeds up and your blood pressure rises. Your arms and legs are ready for vigorous action, maybe your palms sweat. Sound familiar? A surprisingly large proportion of people react to speaking in public as if the audience were a serious threat to their survival.
If you find yourself terrified at the thought of speaking to a group of people, you have unconsciously defined your audience as your adversary, as a threat. This is where your new brain comes to your aid. Whereas the first brain is operating on instinct, the new brain has the amazing ability to direct itself, to choose where to focus.
Your new brain can change what your first brain deems to be a threat by continually directing its focus to a new definition. Think about it. Are those people out there really bent on your destruction? Are they really your judges and executioners, just waiting for you to make a mistake so they can pounce on you? What if we were to re-define the audience? What if we saw them as friends instead of enemies?
In any act of speaking to another person, your listener is your partner. You need each other. Your listener isn’t going to sit in an empty room. He or she needs you there to speak. And you are not going to stand in an empty room and talk. You need your listener(s) to fulfil the purpose of speaking. You are working with each other to make the event meaningful. You are partners.
You can use your powers of focus to insist on a new definition of the audience. You can talk to one friend without feeling judged and criticized can’t you? (If you can’t, that’s not a friend. Think of someone else.) Now put that friend in every seat in the audience. See every one of those people as a friend to whom you are giving your undivided attention and your friendly energy.
Initially, your first brain will object to the new definition. After all, it has been defining audiences as adversaries for a long time. You, however, are in charge of the way your mind thinks, and you have the authority to insist on the new definition. When you identify your listener not as a threat, but as your fellow human being and partner, you will feel a lot more relaxed. What’s more, your changed attitude will broadcast itself to your listeners, and they will feel more relaxed in your presence.
The new definition works whether you are giving a speech to a thousand or speaking to just one person. Your audience is your friend.
Heather Stubbs
